Now, I have written at length about the fact that Pro Wrestling is the one sport I actually care about Off the top of my head, these several posts are all directly about or inspired by Pro Wrestling.
One of my favourite Wrestling techniques is the so-called Asian Mist — the second-most common name seems to be Poison Mist, perhaps to avoid any potential unfortunate Orientalist implications.
Invented by 70s-era Wrestler the Great Kabuki and since then likely most closely associated with Keiji Mutoh (best known for his Great Muta gimmick; the character was presented as Kabuki’s son, but they’re not actually related), the Mist is presented as more-or-less some kind of ninjutsu technique and said to cause temporary or even long-term blindness, depending on either the colour of mist used or the needs of the storyline.
Hmm. That sounds familiar…
In reality, they’re biting into a packet of food colouring. As with most things in Pro Wrestling, it’s a fairly boring bit of theatrical deception engineered to look cool.
It’s not exactly uncommon in Japanese Pro Wrestling circles, though in North American it is inevitably associated with Japanese wrestlers, maybe even to the point of uncomfortable stereotype. I can’t say for certain that it’s never happened, but I can’t think of many non-Japanese wrestlers who have used the Mist — the one exception I can think of is Lord Tensai (incidentally, now the head of the Performance Center under his real name), and even then, his gimmick was still “Wrestled in Japan, Now Thoroughly Immersed in Japanese Culture“.
For example, multi-time champion Asuka has incorporated the Mist into her repertoire since about 2019 or so (though prudently dialing it back during the height of COVID) and by this point, has probably misted every other female Wrestler on the roster at least once. Similarly, Shinsuke Nakamura recently turned Heel and has been Misting Cody Rhodes basically every hour, on the hour.
Copyright
J.B. Norman
“Kat!” Dunstana cries. “Tag me in! Tag me in!”
“What?” Kat asks, staggering to her feet.
“Tag me in!” Dunstana repeats. “Like in Wrestling!”
Kat rolls her eyes, ducks the enemy pirate’s sword, then stumbles towards her sister. As Kat falls to her knees, the palm of her hand slaps Dunstana’s extended hand.
Dunstana leaps into action and Kat thinks she sees her sister cramming something into her mouth as she does.
“Hey, jerk!” Dunstana calls to the pirate.
The pirate stares in bewilderment at Dunstana, who seizes the opportunity created by his eyes widening in shock to strike.
Her cheeks puff up and she spits a cloud of bright green… something into the pirate’s face.
“Gah!” the pirate cries. “My eyes! My vision!”
Blinded by the mist, he staggers around the deck.
“When I can see again,” he vows. “I’m going to stomp you, little girl!”
Dunstana scoffs.
Kat pushes herself back to her feet and makes the most of the opportunity, surging at the pirate and tackling him over the gunwale. He splashes into the water and is eventually fished out by his crewmates.
The enemy ship starts sailing away, leaving Kat, Dunstana, and the Porthaven Raiders victorious.
Dunstana smiles broadly up at Kat, her mouth and lips stained green by her mist.
“Yeah!” Dunstana says happily. “Teamwork!”
“Have you suddenly learned how to be poison?” Kat asks her sister.
“I’m not, like, a snake, Kat,” Dunstana notes. “But that would be cool. No, Tsuru and Tsubame are teaching me about ninjas.”
“What’s a ninja?” Kat asks.
The word feels slightly familiar to her, but she can’t quite place it.
“They’re, like, sneaky fighty guys from Yamatai,” Dunstana explains. “They’re masters of espionage and subterfuge and bunch of other big words and they dress up in black and hide behind things, or underneath things, or they hang from the ceiling, or they disguise themselves as somebody else. And then they jump up and stab people in the face. They sound awesome.”
“And the uh,” Kat gestures at her sister’s green mouth, “spitting?”
“Oh, Tsuru and Tsubame gave me these little packets,” Dunstana answers. “It’s some kind of secret ninja thing. You bite them, and then spit at the guy. Then, when he can’t see, I think you’re supposed to stab him in the face. I think that’s the most important part of being a ninja.”
She shrugs.
“I don’t know what’s in them,” she continues. “But they’re kinda spicy. They don’t taste very good, though, so I don’t think you’re supposed to eat them.”
She frowns.
“I should probably brush my teeth soon,” she decides. “Just in case it is poison.”
She starts walking off.
“Hey, Jimena,” she calls to her first mate. “Did we pack my toothbrush?”
Not for the first time in her life, Kat is left scratching her head and her sister’s antics. Still, now her curiosity is piqued. She’s going to make sure she asks Kokoro about ninjas the next time she’s over at the noodle house.
But, seriously, if I’m ever a Pro Wrestler, my entire moveset will be Misting the other guy…
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