To recap: Egeria is Amara’s cousin, Ainsley is Nolan’s, and Florianne is Kat and Dunstana’s.
So, basically, what I’m saying is that this is the most ambitious crossover in Pop Culture history.
Copyright
J.B. Norman
“Cousin Amy,” Egeria tells Amara. “This here’s Ainsley — she’s Nolan’s cousin, by the by, which I ‘spose means she’s gonna be yer cousin before too long.”
“I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Amara answers.
“Well, that ain’t important now,” Egeria continues. “I spare ya the details, Cousin Amy, but me and Ainsley are in a real pickle right about now. Well, see, me an’ her are working on a monograph together, and we need a copy o’ the third volume o’ Brorvonius’s Observations on the Act of Observing Things.”
“I see,” Amara answers.
“But, cousin Amy,” Egeria says. “There just ain’t a single copy in the entire city o’ Porthaven!”
“Like, omigosh!” Ainsley interjects. “It is just the worst! Volume Three is, like, only the most important book about the philosophy of observation, like ever!”
“We done tried the library, Cousin Amy,” Egeria laments. “An’ the University Library, an’ the Archives, an’ even had a lovely teatime with the owner of the largest private library this side o’ the Midwood, but he even he don’t have a copy!”
“As it happens, I think I know just the person to help,” Amara declares. “Follow me.”
Soon, Egeria and Ainsley are explaining the situation to Florianne Winfield, scion of one of the most famous mercantile families in a Mercantile City and a relentlessly intrepid travelling merchant in her own right.
“So, it’s a rare book you’re looking for? Easy-peasy,” she says. “I’ve got all sorts of connections to the rare book market.”
“That’s right,” Egeria says. “We’re looking fer a copy o’ the third volume o’ Brorvonius’s Observations on the Act of Observing Things.”
“Yeah. I should be able to get my hands on a copy. But, uh, who’s the guy with the shield?”
“That’s Cousin Nolan,” Ainsley explains. “He’s, like, a Guild Captain and everything. He volunteered to come along and help.”
“Hi,” Nolan says.
“Ain’t he got pretty eyes?” Egeria asks. “No wonder Cousin Amy’s got it bad.”
“I am standing right here, Egeria,” Amara notes through clenched teeth.
Egeria shakes her head. “Oh, Cousin Amy. Ya just gotta stop deludin’ yerself. Just shoot yer shot and tell him how ya feel, else some other girl’s gonna swoop in an’ snatch him away.”
“Egeria, what are you talking about?” Nolan asks. “Amara and I don’t — What are you doing?”
Out of corner of his eye, he detects Florianne invading his personal space and leaning in close, uncomfortably close, to him.
“Wow,” she mutters, studying his face. “He does have pretty eyes.”
Nolan blushes, backs away slowly, and wishes he were anywhere else.
“Better back off, Miss Florianne, else Cousin Amy’s gonna get jealous,” Egeria notes.
“Enough, Egeria!” Amara cries.
“Oh, poor Cousin Amy. Bless yer heart…”
Meanwhile, Florianne goes over to wall and reaches down her axe.
“Shall we?”
“Golly, Miss Florianne,” Egeria mutters. “Whaddaya need an axe for?”
“Well,” Florianne answers, hefting her axe over her shoulder. “I happen to be a very competitive businesswoman.”
“Like,” Ainsley says, eyes wide in amazement. “Oh. My. Gosh!”
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