To recap, I’ve previously introduced Egeria, Amara’s cousin from out in the country who’s surprisingly scholarly-minded. As I’ve started writing a full-length story, I’ve been refining her personality and particularly the exact nature of her scholarly pursuits.
You’ll probably also remember that one of the people I did 30 Days of Biographies about was Sibylla of Isidorus, who compiled a book about basically everything. I’ve since started working the angle that Egeria has devoted herself to continuing Sibylla’s work by adding information about her own day. I’m not sure if it will hold up, but I do like that it’s a more specific goal than just “Philosophy.”
Copyright
J.B. Norman
Having decided that she would make it her ambition in life to become a second Sibylla of Isidorus and travel the lands of Realmgard to observe and describe, well, everything, Egeria Valda’s road has taken her to the Duchy of Middlesbrooke. At the request of Egeria’s father, the mayor of the town, the Nearfields Civil Militia has provided Paige, one of its members to accompany Egeria over the course of her travels.
“Golly, Paige,” Egeria muses, hugging her reams of paper to her chest as she and her companion walk down the unfamiliar streets of Middlesbrooke. “I wish I knew what to call ya. We been travellin’ together so long now. Sides, I’m s’posed to be describin’ every ol’ animal, vegetable, mineral, literary device, site o’ scenic interest, ancient ruin, Pelayan folktale, of course, all the fine people o’ Realmgard for my book. And I ain’t even considered I oughta describe you before now.”
“Paige is fine,” the young soldier answers.
“Well, course it is,” Egeria notes. “‘Cause that’s yer name. I mean, I wish I had the word to describe, you know, your job. The exact for your exact role. That sorta thing. Words have power and names is important, and all. So let’s think this out, alright? Well, ya can’t be my manservant, on account o’ ya being a woman. So, are you my bodyguard? My aide-de-camp? My sidekick?”
“I’m sure there’s a word for it,” Paige offers. “We’ll figure it out.”
Paige’s stomach suddenly rumbles and the young soldier blushes.
“Well, we ain’t gonna figure it out on an empty stomach,” Egeria declares. “Let’s find us somewhere to sit down for a good meal. I really oughta sit down and work on editin’ what I already got written down.”
Her face lights up suddenly.
“Oh!” she says happily. “We can have ourselves a traditional Middlesbrookian meal an’ I describe each and every kind o’ thing they serve us.”
“And what is this?” Egeria asks the thoroughly bemused Middlesbrookian stall vendor.
“A sausage?”
“I can see that, but what kinda sausage,” Egeria prompts. “Come on, hun, this is important. The preservation of Realmgard’s historical and cultural patrimony is at stake here!”
“Well,” the vendor stammers. “It’s a… sausage. That I bought from the guy who sells me sausages. And cooked for you because you ordered one. And then cooked twelve more of, because your friend ordered twelve of them.”
“Keep goin’, hun,” Egeria urges. “Y’all can do this.”
“And the, uh, sausage guy says it’s an old family recipe that he learned from his grandmother, who learned it from her grandfather, who stole it from his father-in-law, who won it in a duel with 100 Troll chefs.”
“Now we’re gettin’ somewhere!” Egeria exclaims, hastily writing down the sausage’s origin story — she’ll be the new Sibylla of Isidorus in no time!
“They’re good,” Paige notes. Unlike Egeria, Paige grew up in a simple family of burghers, so conversing through a mouthful of partially-chewed food is not an issue for her. “What’s in them?”
The vendor coughs awkwardly into her elbow.
“As far as you’re concerned, it’s beef.”
Now, the joke here is that “Paige” sounds like “page”, which is basically another word for ‘assistant’, which is what she is…
Currently, in Dungeons & Dragons terms, Egeria seems to be running a “High Intelligence, Low Wisdom” statline.
